Many spouses accuse each other of infidelity during divorce, but this behavior seems to be driven mostly by emotion rather than logic. While it’s true that many states enforce certain financial penalties for spouses who engage in extramarital affairs, one has to wonder whether proving this behavior is even worth it. This is an especially questionable tactic among high-net-worth celebrities, where the reputational effects of a cheating scandal can be far more costly than any financial gain.
Baseball Star Alleges His Wife Had an Affair With Her Pastor
Back in 2021, a famous Major League Baseball player alleged that his wife had an affair with her pastor during their divorce. His wife was a “contemporary Christian singer,” and their marital issues allegedly forced him to pause his sports career. This four-month cause allegedly cost him $8 million in lost income, prompting him to sue the pastor. He also claimed that this pastor took advantage of his celebrity status, frequently requesting tickets to baseball games and highly lucrative autographs.
One has to wonder whether suing a pastor in this manner was truly the best move from a financial perspective, especially since he eventually dropped the lawsuit with no settlement or financial gain. This means that the baseball player effectively wasted money on legal fees, damaged his own reputation, and walked away with nothing. It is also worth noting that the baseball player retired at around the same time as this lawsuit, suggesting that it could have influenced his decision to stop playing.
Finally, it is worth noting that when the baseball player filed his lawsuit, the divorce was already final. Therefore, he did not experience any of the usual benefits associated with these accusations that might occur during divorce proceedings.
Pros and Cons of Accusing Your Ex of Infidelity
There may be certain advantages to accusing an ex of cheating during divorce proceedings. First, certain states provide favorable financial outcomes to spouses who were the victims of adultery during marriage. Some jurisdictions prevent guilty spouses from receiving any alimony whatsoever. If the spouse stands to pay alimony, they may have to increase these payments after adulterous behavior.
Most states also punish spouses for wasting or dissipating marital assets. For example, a spouse might purchase lavish gifts for their illicit partner. They might also spend money on expensive vacations with this individual, perhaps while claiming to go on business trips.
Some spouses might also want to prove infidelity simply to “have their day in court,” and the process of proving this marital misconduct may provide some degree of closure.
On the other hand, proving infidelity may be associated with various disadvantages. First, there is the cost of litigating this endeavor. Although proving this behavior may provide some closure, it will also increase legal fees to a considerable degree.
The reputational impacts may also be problematic. A celebrity or business leader may struggle to recover if this adultery becomes public knowledge – even if they were the victim. One has to wonder whether there is any real advantage to making these accusations, given the downsides.
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